Morpheme Mishegaas
Faux phobias and philes are lexical crimes
A while back, waiting in a ferry terminal, I saw a person who was clearly a biological male but was dressed in fishnet stockings, a short skirt and 6-inch high heels, raising his stature to close to 7 feet. He was heavily made up, wore his long hair in a bun and sported long, colorfully painted, unmistakably faux fingernails.
Even as a long-time New Yorker, I was impressed by the sight. Even, I should confess, amused. Well, the fellow certainly intended to be… noticed.
But, realizing that people living what they think of as their “real lives” is a thing these days, I was not offended by the fellow. In fact, had he chosen to engage me – an Orthodox Jew who, with my suit and black hat, present as non-normative in my own way – and proved a pleasant conversationalist, I might have enjoyed talking with him. (Forgive me; when unaware of a person’s preferred pronouns, I revert to the default biological one.)
At the same time, I have a sincere religious belief that men and women should reflect their respective biologies in their dress and comportment. That said, though, I don’t seek to impose my beliefs on others, nor to disparage them in any way.
And I certainly don’t fear them, which brings me to my gripe.
That some would call me, because of my beliefs, “transphobic” insults me. Worse, it insults something more important than me. It libels language.
Phobia, of course, comes from the Greek phobos, a “fear.” Some suffer from arachnophobia (I get along swimmingly with spiders, and once had a tarantula as a pet); others from acrophobia (I, however, enjoy the view when stopped at the top of ferris wheels); others still, from claustrophobia (well, okay, I prefer not being crowded in, but it’s just a mild dislike, not a fear).
I may disapprove of people adopting identities at odds with their DNA, but the sort of things that frighten me are unleashed pit bulls and muggers, not cross-dressers.
Confession: I also disapprove of homosexual behavior. But there too, I don’t hate those who engage in it, and most certainly am not afraid of them. I guess I could live with being labeled “heterosexist” for my disapproval, but homophobic? Nah. No Fear.
Can we just retire these fake phobias?
And while I’m griping, an even worse insult to English is the use of “pedophile” to mean “pedosexual.”
Book lovers are bibliophiles. Those with affection for Brits are Anglophiles. I, like a good number of sexually normative people, love children. Not lust after them. Love them.
I’m pretty much the opposite of the character W.C. Fields assumed. I particularly exult in engaging the newly-verbal in conversations. Beats any sitcom exchange.
It’s enthralling to me when neighborhood youngsters visit our home to inspect the occupants of our aquarium. I love their curiosity, and love hearing and considering their questions (even when the answer is, as is often the case, “Gee, I don’t know.”)
Of course, I particularly love the kids who were produced by my and my wife’s own children. But the presence of most any child makes me smile.
And that’s the sort of feeling that should be rightfully called pedophilic. After all, no one (even today, I think – or at least hope) is carnally attracted to books.
Yes, I know, I know, language evolves. Words that once meant one thing can come to mean something else. Once upon a time, a mouse was nothing other than a cute rodent, and gay meant nothing other than “happy.” Gigabyte wasn’t a word at all; nor was google (at least spelled that way).
I’ve no problem with linguistic evolution or neologisms. But there’s a point where language hasn’t evolved, it has betrayed. And utterly ignoring the meaning of suffixes like phobic and phile strikes me as something like lexical treason.
Such dereliction bothers me greatly. It doesn’t, however, frighten me.
––––––––––––––––––––––––––––-
My most recent Ami Magazine column, about a controversial death penalty bill in the Knesset, can be read at:
https://amimagazine.org/2025/12/23/brazen-bill-is-killing-killers-overkill/
And a thought on parshas Vayechi is at:
https://www.rabbiavishafran.com/vayechi-the-real-man-in-the-moon/
IF YOU HAVEN’T DONE SO YET, PLEASE SUBSCRIBE AND SHARE THIS WITH OTHERS .
THANKS!